Monday, February 28, 2005
Excitements, Dull, Happiness
Whooooo!! Hey i'm going for atec tomolo!! yeah the finale for my battalion, which means i'm going to finish my ns life in 4 days times..well after the 4 days 3 nights of suffering, tiring, sleepless nights, hungry, smelly! I'm no longer haf to go outfield again!! ha!! Felt so excited abt it i dunno why. Maybe i could sleep for 24 hours at home, So i could recover from this 2 yrs of not enough sleep in camp! no longer had to woke up at 5.30am for breakfast. No longer had to be afraid of doing wrong things and gets weekends guards. More Freedom, smoke where i wan! needless to said i dun haf to do area cleaning everyday! or trying hard to escape from Sai Kang(Shit Work)! No more of wearing the green uniform, Putting on those heavy boots, and carrying all the heavy loads to outfield! WHAT A RELIEF!!!! i won't buy back the times in my ns life, i would perhaps miss those happy times together with my buddy they all. well those few really make my ns life better, not for them i think i would die early!. they brought laughter.Ya tomolo morning i will Move out liao~ be back by thurs! And so my dar jamie, please be good and wake for me, dun put me into a worry state, cus i had atec to really to concentrate on at tt time. i Know u will be good. i will try to call u as possible as i can but this time round theres others ppl around to evaluate us so i can't probably call u all the times or msg u all the time..so u better be good. i promised when i come back i will show u all the love i had! haha... u gotta wait for me, and dun gif me and stuns! oki? =P oki guys gotta stop here going to book in soon and i have not prepared! see ya guys...ORD LO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 2:23 PM
Monday, February 21, 2005
One Last Breathe
TRying to think of what to write and how to put my words into this.. well lets start abt Me and jamie? well things still didn't really go smoothly between us.. still had some arguements. Things i really dunno if its my fault or hers? Well trying to walk away doesn't means i'm trying to escape the fact, i was jus trying to cool down the situation, and by any means not to heat it up again. No point keeps arguing, hence causing more and more problems. well i got to tk it this way. What i wanted to said have already done it, i felt theres nothing more i could do for it, now its jus depending on both of us to work on this. no point saying things again and again but yet no improvement. After every arguement we had, we gets well after tt, well tt was good but isn't it better that we avoid those things. It ain't going to bring us anywhere if we carry on like this?Yup tts all abt my realtionship...Lets talk abt my army life now, well atec is coming and tts marks the end of my National service. Atec a evalution on how well a unit could fight, well i supposed its jus another battalion ex... nothing special onli tt its our last batttalion ex. well looking forward for it, after atec should be having a long break and waiting for ord liao... the day which i have been waiting for since the first day i enlist. It was like so fast, in a blink of eyes, everyone going to ord soon. yup no doubt tt its another part of my life which is going to end, again sweet and bad memories for me to remember.
Alright yesterday went out with the t.r.t members for movie..this time its constantine...not a bad show. Enjoy it.. 30 cigarettes per days at the age of 15...wonder how he do it.. haha.. talking abt ciagrettes WTF prices haf gone up AGAIN!!! 11 bucks per pack... and now 5.5 cents per cigarettes...tts way too ex liao. going to Quit smoking liao( ahahaha cRaps)Ending my blogs here going back to camp tonight. see ya guys next weeks bYeeEee~
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 4:32 AM
Monday, February 14, 2005
What has got into me~
Well this few days, Me and jamie are really getting alot of problems. i dunno what has got me into this. Alright admit my attitude towards her was like shit. she doesn't really desreved this kind of treatment from me.. i duno why i would treat her like this. but its jus tt i feel something is not right...i can't find the remedy to it.is it because of the character we had, or the understanding of each other. The problem is tt perhaps i dun really understand her well. Cus somethings she said i may not really understand what she really wans in her heart. In the case tt makes me feel so lost, keep wondering if she really wans it this way, or if i think what i'm thinking i may get her wrong. TTs misunderstanding, end up arguing whos right whos wrong. i dun think tts what i wans now.. It jus make me so afraid of saying the wrong things or doing the wrongs things to her.
Now she is not by my side i'm thiniking back on my mistakes i made, and what do i really wan from her or what she really wans from me. Repeated mistakes won't do us good.. What she could is to love me or not love me, but what haf in me is i onli can love her and love her deeper. She is jus so important to me tt i can't give her up.. i admit the thinking of breaking up haf float in my mind be4 but tt was jus angry at the point of time, a thinking tt was way too rush. never thought of we still haf a long way to go. it ain't fun ending a relationship jus like tt..
We are old enough to think abt it. Its easy to start a relationship and go through it, but its jus so difficult of letting it go, well i supposed i should think positive. Should not haf pinpoint bad times together to come out this solution. What abt those happy days we were spenting together, those days were enough to cover up the wrongs.
Well valentines days is jus minutes away from now. yet i'm here throwing out my feelings..I dun ask much from u for this special day, wat i'm asking for is spenting this special day with me happily and forget abt those unhappy days. I promised u i won't do things behind yr back, never to leave u, never to gif u attitude.
i do truly love u...
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 3:51 PM
MaRk the end of the Holidaes~!
Well Sunday Feb 13 2005...the end of my CNY holidays~ going back camp tomolo... well this CNY didn't really enjoy myself alot...didn't really have the mood to go enjoy myself so much.except tt going out with t.r.t ytd nights for a drinking session...well throughout this holiday i'm jus feeling tired, tired and tired...nothing much of excitement coming up my life now~ Finding tt i dun realli knows what i wan now...didn't really have a aim or path to go through...Jus going through everyday aimlessly... well perhaps this year is not a good year for me...Yesterday night went to jialing's mum pub to haf a drinking session with the t.r.t its been sometimes we enjoy ourselves or perhaps is jus me...ddrink till vomit...i see u vomit i vomit those kinda feelings...haha... well still feel tt times with t.r.t always so happy, always enjoy myself...
Tomolo i'm booking in camp nothing much to do actually. Jus waiting for the end of the month atec...after atec ORD lo... hahahaha power...the day i haf been waiting for.. see ya guys will updates my blog tonight again.
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 7:33 AM
Thursday, February 10, 2005
True Friends`
Well thought of blogging this to my grp of True friends.. Of cus they are the t.r.t members(ivan,Roger,Jeff,Ah han,Ah Yap,Glenn,Chun) and my 3 long time meet up once friends(Mike,Daniel,Kelvin).Well for the t.r.t glad to haf met u all..True brudders who nv failed to stand by yr side no matter what problem i had to conquer.Well always heed advice from them. They are always so freely, so happy, really enjoy the times spent with them, so much of laughters and joy. We meted each other in different ways, yet our bonding can be so good. We shared almost the same interest, can talk for long. they nv show any faked faces and treat u truly with their heart. tts what i like being with them.. They are always so understanding towards u..all right hereby wish our brotherhood goes long..all the best my brudder!
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 6:40 AM
Happy CNY! Huat ar~
GOng xi Fa cai~ well this new year seems to be a normal day to me..nv went any house visiting.. jus slacking at home with my family.. and onli went to jamie house this morning then came back, thought they were going out, end up they nv go...WTH!! things seems to change so much within this few yrs... no longer a heart warming session with relatives.. Things seems to be so dirferent now..Ppl tends to change...i strongly agree to this, i see ppl change themselves, they are not what they are use to be. Putting on a mask, ppl who changes their attitude..Haf anione thoguht of why ppl changes? Perhaps its something tt makes them change so much.. ppl who use to be so nice haf totally gone..ppl who thinks they are nice but actually they are not. C'mon be yrself, dun put on ani more fake faces. u yrself knows whats happening. I always thought this to myself, never ever think tt u are right, if u are in wrong pls admit it. Dun try to be strong and act tt u were right all the times. Ppl may tends to piss of and change their attitudes in u... and always dun depends on ppl.. u got to make yr own decision. Never do things becus of yr own goods and make ppl suffer. dun always onli think abt yrself, ppl tends to make mistakes.
well i haf a bad attitude and i agree this bad point. but i dun anihow show my attitude out. the times when i'm attitude is when i feel things are not right. i tends to get over sensitive over things. If onli ppl could take the initiative to some things.
Well its another new year to spent, i dun ask for more i jus ask for my family to be in good health, for a peaceful yr and hope things goes well smoothly for me, right now i jus can't concentrate on ani thing...in a case tt really need some one to uds my true feeling how i really feel. i think in this world nv would ani one would really knows how i feel and why i'm like this. i knew the answer but i jus dunno how to express it out.
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 6:35 AM
i Do Feel This
Looking back I clearly seeWhat it is that's killing me
Through the eyes of one I know
I see a vision once let go
I had it all
Constantly it burdens me
Hard to trust and can't believe
Lost the faith and lost the love
When the day is done
Will they open their eyes
And realize we are one
On and on we stand alone
Until our day has come
When they open their eyes
And realize we are one
I love the way I feel today
But how I know the sun will fade
Darker days seem to be
What will always live in me
But still I run
It's hard to walk this path alone
Hard to know which way to go
Will I ever save this day
Will it ever change
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 12:27 AM
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
i'm Glad
U jus called me.. and i love the da it is now..the way u talk was so nice, i hope we would still remain like before...all the attitude, all the stubborn let it be gone...i dun wan the feeling of hanging alone with out u...i wish we could be still as loving be4...Forget abt the unhappiness. i love da way tt u shower care and love on me..i promise u i will change my attitude and can u promise we would still be the way we use to be? I love u...Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 6:15 AM
My words to u...
Well cny is jus tomolo, yet till now i still dun haf the mood, excitement abt it. perhaps things haf been bothering me this few days cause me to be like this. well we had a arguement ytd, i dunno why i'm like this. the words tt u haf said me had taken into me seriously. the thoughts of u saying i dun think of how u feel really makes feel tt i never do my part, u told me u love me more than i do to u.. i admit ytd tt incident was my fault, but have anione really goes deep into me to uds what i really wans and wat i really need? I hope tt we could think back to ourselves the things we did and the times we really cherish. What has done this to me, brining me to this state, its a 1 day basic, it bring me there over times. I hope u know tt i too haf give everything to this r/s. I know the things u did for me was for my own goods, care abt how i feel. All along the small lil things i do for u can't compared to my love for u? i'm not really good at expressing out my feeling, the onli way is right through here. all right i haf attitude problems, i will try to change it. What i really wan to do now is really balanced up my life between u and my friends. Friends as i would not wan to gif up in any circumstances, and u too.. Times i was in a dilema, u need all of my attention towards u.. i uds tt...cus i too wan yr attention towards me. i hope u know tt what u did for me i'm really appreciate and not by forgetting after its past, Every couples haf their own problems...seeking a solution to it.. uds each other better, not by comparing. what i wan from u is i hope u would know my true feeling towards u, let me do my part to be yr bf. I hope what i did wrong to u, u won't repeat my mistakes in order to let me know yr feelings. It ain't going to be anywhere. i hope if u truly treat this relationship and think abt what i jus said, or u still believe in yrself, i had said wat i had what i could, the rest is up to u.. nv do i thought of leaving u... i do love u~Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 1:36 AM
Monday, February 07, 2005
Lost Lost Lost~
All right guys i'm here right now at 2.02am...i dunno wats cooping up in me...i jus felt lost.. i jus felt tt i really dunno what i wan, i'm like in a big mess now.. i'm not sure wat i'm worrying abt. things jus keep floating up to me...more and more of question marks.. jus need a true answer. Any one could pull me out of this? or perhaps some one could gif me a answer..well i'm really not sure tt the things i'm worrying abt is really right or wrong, perhaps i should not haf think too much, sometimes the answer i get was not wat i wan, wat i thought it would be, i'm not sure if i could reassure to myself, i felt tt i'm not wat i use to be wat i am. i feel something is jus missing in my life.. i really need someone to tell me wat am i suppose to do now..Because i love u i will be by yr side, to be yr guy.. i hope u could see this blog, i hope what u meant and wat u promise me last time u still will keep the promise. I love u...All right now lets talk abt my tt stupid dog.. till now he is still shitting and shhh shhh all around! My mum is going crazy soon...every morning Roxy jus keeps barking, then my mum bark louder than him!! lol ok i know i'm bad i should not haf said her! but hey he is jus a 3 month old poor lil kids.. haha well shouldn't it be more like a human baby tt cries when he is hungry, or needs someone attention. i had posted his innocence pic up...dun be deceived by his look, actually he is jus trying to show us his pitiful looks.. oki more or less he indeed add more energy to my home.. at least i get to look aft him when i had nothing to do!! haha but mostly is no time one!
its 2.15 now another 5 more hrs i'm going to wake up to pick up My jamie! Senting her to sch for the last time!! now i think she is soundly asleep~ some words to tell her but i think its not appropriate to said it here..leave it to her to get to see this blog and ask me what it is.. well at least now i'm back on track in this blog.
CNY is reaching closer and closer but i dun feel its coming, to me now is jus like a normal day to me, nothing special to me, use to be so excited abt it.. now? no longer had this feeling..maybe if i know some one could gif me a $1000 ang bao then i will get excited(money face) lol! My ns life is going to end soon, i'm not sure if i'm really going to put in 101% of interest in my studies at TP. i got to work part time to cover up my expenses...if not i'm really going to eat shit everyday!!
i shall stop now if not i won't be able to wake up tomolo, and jamie sure will killed me!! oki good night guys. feel much better saying all these haha!! see ya!
Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 6:22 PM
all right This is my stupid dog!! Roxy here~!
