Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Broken Dreams of Boulevard

Its tues yay, booking in tonight gotta go back camp again, tt old folks home! haaha well didn't really did much today, change a new blog skins, ya and my favourite green day song is there ha~ so nice...to me onli.. yup ytd night jamie treat me to pasta mania, as usual had my al funghi, same as last time, brought me back to coffee club, where i use to work there for 3 wks? haha al funghi simple but i dunno how to said la, jus love tt.. yup, went woodlands to pick her up and then back to bishan...phew far...

ha today she slept till 5 plus, didn't get to mit her again, time being together i felt really deterioate. ha~ talk to her on the phone, she felt so frustrated cus i onli answer ya, orh, but hey i use to be like this since last time... why u felt so frustrated? haiz.. i am jus dumb. i dun haf much words to talk one i think u should know unless for some occasion, if not i dun talk really tt much.

ha~ perhaps u like a talkative person? i try to talk all the rubbish to u next time..like this u would be happier. And ya i think u are growing old liao...everyday also here pain there pain, better take care of yr health. u are onli 18. yet here pain there pain, no help liao.. next time old liao how to take care of u? better be a healthy u. ha end of my another boring blog.. gotta go preapre for book in liao...

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 11:40 AM

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Accounted for

hey my last blog well 4 days ago, agony... didn't really do much over the weekends, well went zoo on good fridays..with jamie and his bros. walking ard zoo was realli tiring, but ok lar huh, dun complain so much still manage to fresh back those primary sch times, with those small lil kids, haha getting consent forms been approve by parents, jus for going to zoo! lame right!? well didn't really change much, the polar is still there the freaking orang utan is still there, wats more? haha all the tigers, cheetah, snakes. blah blah blah. well starting sch is jus 1 month plus away i supposed. well getting bits of excitement, panaroid over it. dunno still can cope with school works, projects. but of cus meeting new friends, pls dun put me into a class with ah bengs.. or those kind of ah lians tt freaking hell thinks tt ah beng could save their worlds, Onli wan face. haha

ok back to wat i did instead..no ah bengs pls ok? haha.. well sat, we were celebrating birthday for jeff. yeah went orchard had our dinner catch movie then go home liao. haha hey dun think tt its boring ok! cus we had fun through this process. laughters, joy, taking pictures. a nice and memorable birthday for him. yeah got home at 3 plus. well on my heater waiting for my shower, lying on my beds so comfortable end up dozing off..wahaha slept for 5 mins and took a quick shower, tuck in to beds, within 5 mins my mind is switch off.

well woke up at 1 plus, someone msg me, waking me up. its not jamie, cus she always woke up late than me. Its roger, asking me go cck wash bike with him and chun! well after thinking ok lar, on my way HEAVY RAINS!!!!!!! dammit it...of cus got myself all wet! siazz liao got numb of been drench in da rain~ jus continue my way to chun house, then change to his underwers and t-shirt haha! and ya my number plate is broke too.. hai gotta go make a new one later. Right now find tt nothing special in my life, gotta find something to spice it up. i dunno what it is wait till i find out i tell ya.

ivans back tomolo from taiwan MmMmmmm dunno whats he is going to get for us, but its not important wat matters is tt hes back my all times buddy, listen to his cock stuffs really ease my pain haha..=) well take care guys gotta go..

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 3:27 PM

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Sleepless

Ha~ sleepless nights again...woke up and can't seem to go back to sleep. Well its been 4th month already, together for 4 month, encounter much obstacles, hurdles. Remember u told me once, we will strive forward every hurdles we met, nothings gotta stop us. i hope we are still going on. Well seems like we hardly talk much nowadays. i dnno why i always had this kind of feeling tt u won't bother abt me, or care so much abt my stuffs, i sense it.. perhaps i'm wrong. i Hope so. i know the reason u told me before, i guess i had to accept the fact. Have been thinking this few days wat is actually missing in our relationship. Ha! i can't find the answer. Is it going to be like this when we were together for 4 month? If i hurt u, i'm sorry. Felt so lil time spent with u. Maybe is becus i'm too free and u are busy with yr work or wat, tts why i felt this way. The fact was the moment i saw u tt day when u came to find me when i was sick, i felt a sudden pain in my heart, strange! nv had this feeling before, tts why i asked u do u still love me? at that point of time i admit i wanted assurance from u. I dunno how long i could still hold on to u, uhad yr thinking and i had mine too. Right now i really dunno what u are thinking, i'm not sure. I keep telling myself to run away from all these problems, dun think so much, but it jus keep floating in my mind, felt the pain, a impact to me. i told myself everything will be fine after awhile, i dunno its gotta be how long, but i will try my best to overcome this. lastly wanted to tell u, i do still love u. True from my heart, tt now every moment i'm thnking of u. jus hope u could see this now.

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 6:02 PM

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

unbearable pain

I felt so cold, my fever came back i dunno why~ i was fine in the morning, got a headache at first, i thought it was jus normal but i felt so tired. Taken my temperature it reads 38.0... Well the med didn't help and now i'm going to see the doc again~ ALONE!! haiZzzz no one was there now...i supposed i really had to go alone...=) all right gotta go now, take care guys...

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 5:25 AM

Sunday, March 20, 2005

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Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 7:08 AM

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Fresh morning

Hey guys a Very good morning to you~ ya its been sometimes since i had over 10 hrs of sleep. It feel so good so fresh~ Well ytd reach home about 10 plus, supposed to went over orchard to meet yin xuan but it was too late and he already well home.. so i jus took this chance to slp at 11.30..

Well my mum kao bei abt the dog...everyday clean his shit...but hey when u were alone at home u were happileh playing with him, haha contradicting! Well poor ivan still got abt one more week then come back from taiwan, army oversea training really sux, u got to pack yr stuff go over unpack all the shit and prepare. life oversea during army training really can't make it. i guess its becus of the environment u live in. Well went brunei once and its really like hell, a place meant for those bangalah to stay haha!

anyway its friday, so i guess its partying time, its been sometimes i went to clubbing. well spots to club of cus zouk, puture. ha... Well ivan when wana jio me go zouk again! haha!

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 4:00 AM

Friday, March 18, 2005

RElaX RelAx RelaX~

hey guys life really different after atec well gets to sleep the whole day, gamble the whole day smoke in bunk! haha SHIOK...of cus u had lotsa of time to spent tt u dunno wans to do wat...its so boring, of cos thinking too much is what happen when u had too much time,,,lazying ard.. Well things didn't really go smoothly. Had number of thoughts again! of cus its not abt friendship or money matters, its jus relationship.

Things i nv expected had comes...things i nv wanted to happen has happen. i dun wish to said it over here. What i wana express out is my feeling towards this. Right now do i haf a choice? NO! decision is up to u...i'm jus a normal puppet being manipulated. what i could do is jus either walk away and leave u or continue to treat u the same as before. i Choose the second way, cus i can't let go. If the decision u made and its not me i will let go.

I dunno to u, perhaps u could tk it easy, but i'm sorry i haf my feelings, i can't jus treat it tt nothing happens. in another words if its was the another way round how would u feel.. humans are selfish they always wans other to uds but not by putting themselves in others situation. Till this had happen. i felt u are going to leave me. no longer the old us, everything jus change so fast. Touch yr heart and tell yrself, what u would really wans. i know u dun wan to left with empty handed.

Well the one week given, i hoped for the answer. at the moment i could or in other words jus relax myself dun give u too much pressure or stress this again. Making into consideration. Mixed feeling...

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 3:05 PM

Sunday, March 13, 2005

So Sad~

Ha! She's leaving me..So sad~ but nvm la...

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 8:53 PM

True or False

True or false..MmMmm wondering what i'm suppose to do well. The feeling of seeing u with different ppl was really a hrad time but nvm i will tk it easily.. pretendence..=) well met up with roger and sky ytd, they help me alot, can't stop thinking but they helped. Lets put it this way both of our circle of friends is different. i respect u having the friends u haf...nv interfere. jus think wat u do really haf a thoughts of wats my feeling? Maybe i should not be so sensitive. Its ok if u go enjoy with yr friends. no hard feeling i mean it.. i may look siazzz but after some times i will juss forget abt it. Well Balancing yr life is wat u should do. Tts wat u wan to do. Be true to yrself. Do things u think tt is right for u.

Well i felt way between human should be true to each other, Thinking is one point. If u are not trueful to yrself dun u feel guilty afterall? well if u dun feel it, then i could said u would continue to be like this, a leopard tt nv changes its spot. Wat i learn from life, what u could do, vice versa ppl could do it too. by then u realise how pain u would be. If a human nv realise thie faults. Nv try to win other ppl confident in yrself jus by saying, its pointless. well ppl may think i'm crappy, try thinking it over. Nv pretend things nv happen. Well Cherish the ppl ard u, the importance of tt person may seem easy on u of if one day u would really lose tt person hows yr feeling, maybe u would jus be sad by a peroid of time and u could be out partying again.

All right i shall stop, the rest would leave it up to u ppl to think abt. its nv too late to tk action now.

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 6:59 AM

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Sadness in my eyes

The sadness in my eyes no one could see it, when i needed some one no one was really there, things haf really change, i felt and i feel the sorrow, things was nv close any more. Promises are meant to break, i take it. i swollen everything in. i guess i haf to live to myself again today. theres so much things i wanted to tell u but i didn't haf the chance. i nv had a chance to said to u. or i could said i nv had the courage to tell u. Things i can't take it i had to learn to do it now. Time was nv like before anymore. I would indeed try to save it. If u are feeling Tired of me pls let me know. If u had enough of me Pls let me know too. though at times i may be different but my love for u nv changed at all.. Right now all the things u do i felt tt u were going to leave. i could onli see u slowly walking further and further away from me. I dunno what u wan now. nv wanted to ask, trying to know by myself but i failed. I know i feel, i dunno what makes the changes, perhaps its me to blame. That makes the changes. I wan a answer from u, the truth. I felt so lost now.

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 3:55 PM

Broken

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; Not know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause Im broken when Im lonesome
And I dont feel right when youre gone away

youre gone away; you dont feel me here anymore

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
Theres so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause Im broken when Im open
And I dont feel like I am strong enough
Cause Im broken when Im lonesome
And I dont feel right when youre gone away

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 6:27 AM

Friday, March 11, 2005

Be strong,Hold On

Hiding in a corner, looking at my own shadow, hoping he would revive and tell me. felt like him, dull, lifeless. only now i get to know what she wans. nv notice or realise it. nv use to be like last time before. i such a failure, a failure which only hide himself. nv know what i did was wrong, nv meant to stop it. the pain slowly emits into me, pain i nv had before. Things was not like last time now, we had our own life. Always thought we shared one, i was wrong. i dunno what turn this out. But perhaps its better for her. Things tt goes a few month and now then i know. its a change in me? use to sarcifice but now no longer. i'm ain't good at this. Kept in silence always, anyone knows how i really feel? no ones ever really try to go deep into me. i'm always told like i was told. i felt so much, i felt i could jus leave and avoid it. i can't.. things happen i try to act i was strong but i'm not i'm none other than those who is weak. i would try to suit to what u wan. Put away the past...starts afresh, wipe away those sadness, Live it on, i promised i would nv be like last time. I'm going to work out a new me. A me nv had anyone see before. A big turn out...

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 1:00 PM

Wash away those unhappiness

My anger's violent, But still I'm silent,When tragedy strikes at home
I know this decadence Is shared by millions, i'm told i'm not alone...continue to strive forward. When I'm all alone and no one else is there. Waiting by the phone
To remind me I'm still here When shadows paint the scenes Where spotlights used to fall And I'm left wondering Is it really worth it all? Suddenly felt u had left me. I'm all alone.

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 11:05 AM

Boring~!!!

Its another boring day i think~! no programmes... FULL STOP!

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 5:38 AM

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Facts abt human~

Hi guys well nothing to blog abt so why not write out things abt human? MMm well how should i start with... all right lets go abt saying human characters... some ppl may tends to think they are right always, although they are in wrong. and insist ppl to apologised. well the fact was if ppl could jus forget it and apologised to u, cus they dun wan any more of arguement. Times goes ppl close to u may jus drifted away from u.. ppl who can't stand anymore.. haha jus crap la..but think twice perhaps things really happen..

Yup another topic abt hypocrites. haha well nv act out another self to others jus to impress others, well isn't this tiring! be yrself, u are jus what u are no nid to hide yr ugly side away, sooner or later it will be seem by others. Dun try to said things to jus impress others too, if u nv do it or u can't do it pls for goodness said dun tell others u can..

Liars was another issues ppl loves to hate..but before u said u hate liars think abt yrself.. u nv tell lies before? to yr parents or to yr closest one. trying to lie to others jus to make them believe u? or jus to let them feel tt u are not tt kind of person? nv try to act, in da sense tt u know u did something bad before and act like u nv do before and try to make others believe, another form of lies?

Selfish...well human i'm sure tends to be selfish, be it abt things, relationship, materials or friends.

Posted by PuREMilk's Article at 5:36 AM

Monday, March 07, 2005

WhOoOOo Happy Ending!!

Ha! Atec is gone, so is my army life!! yeah...finish atec last week, i dunno whats the result for our battalion. tt doesn't matter as long as i completed my ns life in one piece.. yup so excited...everyone was like celebrating...talking abt all those things we nid not haf to do anymore...no more of outfield. no more of guard duties! but hey shit! on the mar 18th i had one! haizzz hopefully its my last guard duty... well atec was not really very siong...the siong part was the first mission... we had a walk to our objectives, moreover we are rushing for the h hour... so our oc walk so fast, we couldn't catch with him....dammit! i was draggin myself...had this feeling i'm going to collaspe soon.. but well forcing myself telling my self its the last...

ha! we took some photos too.. actually had quite a great time. yesterday ivan went over taiwan for his atec. he sound so sad, but nvm i know he is going to come back with a smile. no doubt another 2 more months i'm going to embark into another chapter of my life...

going to tp as i mention many times already.. dun really know what i'm supposed to do. i ever thought of skipping class already, ha sch didn't even starts and i had this thoughts.. well devils on my side.

all right jamie said i nv mention her in my blog for a long time...then now i'm doing this for her. if not i think she is going to run away soon.. She is still sleeping, a girl i nv see before, who could sleep the whole day! Lazy bum... haha. ok la i still love her.. always trying to find things to said i not good.. i really not good? then how? well up to u... oki.. guys gotta go wash bike liao, its been millions yr i had wash my baby haha!! all right take care! ORD LO!!!!!!!